Just for laughs!! - Page 22 - Rape Board

AWDracer · 01-10-2008, 03:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ego

Have a history teacher explain this...if they can:

Abraham Lincoln was elected to Congress in 1846.
John F. Kennedy was elected to Congress in 1946.

Abraham Lincoln was elected President in 1860.
John F. Kennedy was elected President in 1960.

Both were particularly concerned with civil rights.
Both wives lost their children while living in the White House
Both Presidents were shot on a Friday.
Both Presidents were shot in the head.

Now it gets really weird.

Lincoln's secretary was named Kennedy.
Kennedy's Secretary was named Lincoln.

Both were assassinated by Southerners.
Both were succeeded by Southerners named Johnson.

Andrew Johnson, who succeeded Lincoln, was born in 1808.
Lyndon Johnson, who succeeded Kennedy, was born in 1908.

John Wilkes Booth, who assassinated Lincoln, was born in 1839.
Lee Harvey Oswald, who assassinated Kennedy, was born in 1939.

Both assassins were known by their three names.
Both names are composed of fifteen letters.
Now hang on to your seat.

Lincoln was shot at the theatre named 'Ford.'
Kennedy was shot in a car called 'Lincoln' made by 'Ford.'

Lincoln was shot in a theatre and his assassin ran and hid in a
warehouse.
Kennedy was shot from a warehouse and his assassin ran and hid in a
theatrer

Booth and Oswald were assassinated before their trials.

And here's the kicker...

A week before Lincoln was shot, he was in Monroe, Maryland
A week before Kennedy was shot, he was with Marilyn Monroe.

Creepy huh? Send this to as many people as you can, cause:
Hey, this is one history lesson people don't mind reading

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DJ Johnny Wishbone B.K.A- Da W.B.Â®
1029 ENTERTAINMENT/GLAMMAMUSIC
409 3SUM INC.........
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The "historical" lesson you are spreading is false information. Not your fault though, most people wouldn't really know.

http://www.snopes.com/history/americ...ln-kennedy.asp

ego · 01-10-2008, 06:37 AM

Thx for letting me know!

Wiz · 01-11-2008, 03:17 PM

Two hillbillies walk into a bar. While having a shot of whiskey, they talk about their moonshine operation.

Suddenly, a woman at a nearby table, who is eating a sandwich, begins to choke. After a minute or so, it becomes apparent that she is in real distress. One of the hillbillies looks at her and says, 'Kin ya swaller?'

The woman shakes her head no.

Then he asks, 'Kin ya breathe?'

The woman begins to turn blue and shakes her head no.

The hillbilly walks over to the woman, lifts up her dress, yanks down her panties and quickly gives her right butt cheek a lick with his tongue. The woman is so shocked that she has a violent spasm and the obstruction flies out of her mouth. As she begins to breathe again, the Hillbilly walks slowly back to the bar.

His partner says, 'Ya know, I'd heerd of that there 'Hind Lick Maneuver' but I ain't niver seed nobody do it!'

Ntense · 01-12-2008, 11:48 AM

(laughs) there's a video of that one...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2xg7zwT2gQk

ego · 01-14-2008, 10:43 AM

4 Chinese, ' Chu ', 'Bu', 'Fu' and 'Su' decided to immigrate to the US.
In order to get a visa, they had to adapt their names to American standards...

So: ' Chu ' became Chuck. 'Bu' became Buck.
'Fu' and 'Su' decided to stay in China .

donnalee_s · 01-14-2008, 11:43 AM

hope some of these will produce a chuckle or two
just misc funnies
1

donnalee_s · 01-14-2008, 11:44 AM

misc
2

donnalee_s · 01-14-2008, 11:50 AM

misc
3

donnalee_s · 01-14-2008, 11:51 AM

misc
4

donnalee_s · 01-14-2008, 11:53 AM

misc
5

donnalee_s · 01-14-2008, 11:54 AM

misc
6

donnalee_s · 01-14-2008, 11:55 AM

and last
and true

have a good week all you perverts/pervertettes

RapeU · 01-14-2008, 05:33 PM

RapeU · 01-14-2008, 05:34 PM

Wiz · 01-15-2008, 01:48 PM

Fairy Tale

One day, long, long ago, there was this woman who surprisingly, did not whine, nag, and bitch........

But this was a long time ago.....
and it was just ONE day.

The End

ego · 01-15-2008, 02:26 PM

Wiz, you are married, arent you?

RapeU · 01-15-2008, 08:17 PM

If he is I can give him this shirt

Wiz · 01-15-2008, 10:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ego

Wiz, you are married, arent you?

Just on the off-chance that your question wasn't rhetorical, yes ego, I am married .... 35 years ..... same woman

Thanks for the T-shirt RapeU

Ntense · 01-20-2008, 11:53 AM

Ntense · 01-22-2008, 10:27 PM

Since I just posted the 'horse race' over in the 'last person to post here' thread, I figured I ought to follow up with:

Spike Jones - You Always Hurt The One You Love

3.7meg MP-3

01-10-2008, 06:37 AM	#422
ego the obscure Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 3,457 Reputation: 14892	Thx for letting me know! __________________ ..lure them all into the abyss!

01-11-2008, 03:17 PM	#423
Wiz if ever a Wiz there was! Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: The Great White North eh. Posts: 1,854 Reputation: 23553	Hillbilly First Aid Two hillbillies walk into a bar. While having a shot of whiskey, they talk about their moonshine operation. Suddenly, a woman at a nearby table, who is eating a sandwich, begins to choke. After a minute or so, it becomes apparent that she is in real distress. One of the hillbillies looks at her and says, 'Kin ya swaller?' The woman shakes her head no. Then he asks, 'Kin ya breathe?' The woman begins to turn blue and shakes her head no. The hillbilly walks over to the woman, lifts up her dress, yanks down her panties and quickly gives her right butt cheek a lick with his tongue. The woman is so shocked that she has a violent spasm and the obstruction flies out of her mouth. As she begins to breathe again, the Hillbilly walks slowly back to the bar. His partner says, 'Ya know, I'd heerd of that there 'Hind Lick Maneuver' but I ain't niver seed nobody do it!' __________________ If you find that life is a short, meaningless journey filled with emptiness and pain, just get all the pussy you can.

01-12-2008, 11:48 AM	#424
Ntense Privileged Member Join Date: May 2007 Location: Texass Posts: 688 Reputation: 541	(laughs) there's a video of that one... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2xg7zwT2gQk __________________ Character is what you are in the dark... John Whorfin

01-14-2008, 10:43 AM	#425
ego the obscure Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 3,457 Reputation: 14892	4 Chinese, ' Chu ', 'Bu', 'Fu' and 'Su' decided to immigrate to the US. In order to get a visa, they had to adapt their names to American standards... So: ' Chu ' became Chuck. 'Bu' became Buck. 'Fu' and 'Su' decided to stay in China . __________________ ..lure them all into the abyss!

01-14-2008, 11:44 AM	#427
donnalee_s almost gone Join Date: Jun 2007 Posts: 9,377 Reputation: 33747	misc 2 Last edited by donnalee_s; 01-20-2008 at 11:14 PM.

01-14-2008, 11:43 AM	#426
donnalee_s almost gone Join Date: Jun 2007 Posts: 9,377 Reputation: 33747	hope some of these will produce a chuckle or two just misc funnies 1

01-14-2008, 11:50 AM	#428
donnalee_s almost gone Join Date: Jun 2007 Posts: 9,377 Reputation: 33747	misc 3

01-14-2008, 11:51 AM	#429
donnalee_s almost gone Join Date: Jun 2007 Posts: 9,377 Reputation: 33747	misc 4

01-14-2008, 11:53 AM	#430
donnalee_s almost gone Join Date: Jun 2007 Posts: 9,377 Reputation: 33747	misc 5

01-14-2008, 11:54 AM	#431
donnalee_s almost gone Join Date: Jun 2007 Posts: 9,377 Reputation: 33747	misc 6

01-14-2008, 11:55 AM	#432
donnalee_s almost gone Join Date: Jun 2007 Posts: 9,377 Reputation: 33747	and last and true have a good week all you perverts/pervertettes

01-14-2008, 05:33 PM	#433
RapeU Yes = No. No = Yes Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Texas Posts: 2,412 Reputation: 33359	__________________ Stories I have written. The Red Rose Rapist short stories Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, Sugar Is Sweet, The Rapist Is You!? The Kidnapping Chronicles The Hunter, Huntress, LK, The Masked Marauder, Melinda's Tale, and The Masked Marauder II - Allen's Revenge Other Stories At My Cousin's Wedding

01-14-2008, 05:34 PM	#434
RapeU Yes = No. No = Yes Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Texas Posts: 2,412 Reputation: 33359	__________________ Stories I have written. The Red Rose Rapist short stories Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, Sugar Is Sweet, The Rapist Is You!? The Kidnapping Chronicles The Hunter, Huntress, LK, The Masked Marauder, Melinda's Tale, and The Masked Marauder II - Allen's Revenge Other Stories At My Cousin's Wedding

01-15-2008, 01:48 PM	#435
Wiz if ever a Wiz there was! Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: The Great White North eh. Posts: 1,854 Reputation: 23553	Fairy Tale One day, long, long ago, there was this woman who surprisingly, did not whine, nag, and bitch........ But this was a long time ago..... and it was just ONE day. The End __________________ If you find that life is a short, meaningless journey filled with emptiness and pain, just get all the pussy you can.

01-15-2008, 02:26 PM	#436
ego the obscure Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 3,457 Reputation: 14892	Wiz, you are married, arent you? __________________ ..lure them all into the abyss!

01-15-2008, 08:17 PM	#437
RapeU Yes = No. No = Yes Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Texas Posts: 2,412 Reputation: 33359	If he is I can give him this shirt __________________ Stories I have written. The Red Rose Rapist short stories Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, Sugar Is Sweet, The Rapist Is You!? The Kidnapping Chronicles The Hunter, Huntress, LK, The Masked Marauder, Melinda's Tale, and The Masked Marauder II - Allen's Revenge Other Stories At My Cousin's Wedding

01-20-2008, 11:53 AM	#439
Ntense Privileged Member Join Date: May 2007 Location: Texass Posts: 688 Reputation: 541	__________________ Character is what you are in the dark... John Whorfin

01-22-2008, 10:27 PM	#440
Ntense Privileged Member Join Date: May 2007 Location: Texass Posts: 688 Reputation: 541	Since I just posted the 'horse race' over in the 'last person to post here' thread, I figured I ought to follow up with: Spike Jones - You Always Hurt The One You Love 3.7meg MP-3 __________________ Character is what you are in the dark... John Whorfin