Wine Snobbery - Rape Board

batffink · 05-04-2009, 04:27 AM

While I was in Queensland last week, I watched a programme on the TV about food and wine.
I couldnâ€™t help but shake my head in resignation as some plonker pontificated about some vintage as;
â€œA decidedly precocious little drop, somewhat reminiscent of custard apple and pencil shavings and quite cheeky on the nose.â€
And;
â€œIâ€™m quite excited about this vintage, obviously from the North Slope, and picked rather late. With overtones of ear wax and a rather aggressive attack on the palate.â€
I ask you, are these wankers for real. Do they actually get paid to mouth this drivel? Or am I an uneducated Philistine?
I like wine as much as the next man but I buy what I like and donâ€™t try to piss in other peopleâ€™s pockets and try to impress them with a heap of bullshit.
What do you think? I know some of you are from great wine producing regions i.e. California, Australia, France and Italy so how do you see it?

FuckingRotter · 05-04-2009, 04:56 AM

I used to think that all that wine snobbery was a load of old bollocks. But a couple of years ago Aunty Beeb started showing a series in which James May, a complete beer swilling wine novice travelled across Europe with a wine expert. Now this bloke isn't one of these head up arsehole types and he taught James May that the essence of wine tasting is to describe what you taste.

That is where all this sheep shit and pencil shaving nonsense comes from. Sounds like the chap you saw on the Noah was over-egging the pudding somewhat. But if you get a chance to watch the series with James May (I forget the other blokes name), then it may all begin to make sense.

MARADONA · 05-04-2009, 07:00 AM

I never watched shows of this kind...so i don't know exactly how it works...btw...i'm italian....
we are the best producers of red in wine in the all world...so i think i know what is good...

so i never think that the "all that wine snobbery was a load of old bollocks"...eh eh
but i do think that some people are extreme...more then once i visitated some wine producers...
specially in Pavia...and yes it still makes me laugh to see old people drink and spit extreme cool wines...
it's just that i like only to drink wine...not to spit it.

FuckingRotter · 05-04-2009, 07:36 AM

There is some method in their madness! I understand that most of what we taste is actually composed of information from smell receptors. So you take a big gulp whilst breathing in sharply through the nose and swirling the wine around the mouth to ensure all you taste buds get a bit. The spitting out is to reduce the effects of alcohol in dulling the senses.

I smoke quite heavily, and I have neither the time, money or inclination to learn as comprehensively about wine as these poncy experts, but as Batfink says I know what I like. My preference is for old world reds, especially French, Italian and Spanish, but I've also developed a taste for Chilean wine in the last few years. White wine I tend to limit myself to anything from a Chardonnay grape, so Chablis, Champagne and Cognac is right up my street. Sicily produces some dry Chardonnays that come out at a higher alcohol content than usual and go great with oysters.

Still, wine is like art, all a matter of taste.

pervipete · 05-04-2009, 09:16 AM

The guy with James May FR is called Oz Clarke

MARADONA · 05-04-2009, 10:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FuckingRotter

There is some method in their madness! I understand that most of what we taste is actually composed of information from smell receptors. So you take a big gulp whilst breathing in sharply through the nose and swirling the wine around the mouth to ensure all you taste buds get a bit. The spitting out is to reduce the effects of alcohol in dulling the senses.

I smoke quite heavily, and I have neither the time, money or inclination to learn as comprehensively about wine as these poncy experts, but as Batfink says I know what I like. My preference is for old world reds, especially French, Italian and Spanish, but I've also developed a taste for Chilean wine in the last few years. White wine I tend to limit myself to anything from a Chardonnay grape, so Chablis, Champagne and Cognac is right up my street. Sicily produces some dry Chardonnays that come out at a higher alcohol content than usual and go great with oysters.

Still, wine is like art, all a matter of taste.

Yes i know why they do that...i just think you are going to loose a lot...but this is just me!

Btw, i see you have a good culture towards wines...to be honest i don't like Chilean wines...
i tryed several of them when i have been in Peru...but no one was good for me...same for wines from Argentina...
spanish wiens are good...but a touch too rough for me...did you ever tryed "il Rosso" or "il Brunello" di Montalcino?
If not...i strongly advice you to try the brand "Barbi"...to me is the best one we have.

FuckingRotter · 05-04-2009, 10:34 AM

That's it, Oz Clarke. Thanks Pete.

I think Montalcino is available here Maradona, but not the better vats, just the stuff that might as well get turned into cooking sherry and gets sold at Happy Shopper for inflated prices. Just goes to show price is no guide when it comes to wine. I usually spend £6-8.50 on a bottle, but the major supermarket chains here all sell decent own brand plonk for around £3, that serves just as well poured in a bolognese sauce or poured down your own throat!

snarkopo · 05-04-2009, 12:58 PM

Same as art critics, they're full of shit.
Nice to see you back btw.

MARADONA · 05-04-2009, 04:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by newland11

Barbi?I'll try it

I am usually for red wine but the best wine i've ever tried is
Picolit from Friuli Venezia Giulia...It's white wine with a sweet taste...
Delicious!!!

I like white wines as well...if you want to know i drink wine everyday...RED & WHITE!

I will look for it...if i can find i will let you know my "review"!

Quote:

Originally Posted by FuckingRotter

That's it, Oz Clarke. Thanks Pete.

I think Montalcino is available here Maradona, but not the better vats, just the stuff that might as well get turned into cooking sherry and gets sold at Happy Shopper for inflated prices. Just goes to show price is no guide when it comes to wine. I usually spend Â£6-8.50 on a bottle, but the major supermarket chains here all sell decent own brand plonk for around Â£3, that serves just as well poured in a bolognese sauce or poured down your own throat!

Yes i know...italians wines are kinda expensives...also the Barbi brand isn't cheaper here as well....
"il Rosso" goes around the 10/15 euros..."il Brunello" around the 30/40...better to drink a good "Chianti" i guess!

ChiTownHoney · 05-04-2009, 06:40 PM

I thought all english people were snobs

batffink · 05-04-2009, 07:37 PM

They are Chitown, they are! But I'm Scottish.

HRH1948 · 05-04-2009, 08:41 PM

I spent a year in Canada during one week, a decade or so back. They had a 1 to 10 scale of sweetness in all of their wine shops. It was great. A #1 tasted like ethanol and a # 10 tasted like melted jello. A #5 suited my taste very well. At home, that system doesn't exist.

If I could get past the sweetness issue, I could concentrate on being more of a conasieur.

dashrendar44 · 05-04-2009, 08:48 PM

were you in ontario? were the only province that has mandated alcohol shops, you cant get liquor anywhere but at the LCBO shops, and you can only get beer at the aptly named "the beer store" chains. ive never really seen that scaley thing, but then again, im usually at the LCBo for rum and vodka, not vino

HRH1948 · 05-04-2009, 09:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dashrendar44

were you in ontario? were the only province that has mandated alcohol shops, you cant get liquor anywhere but at the LCBO shops, and you can only get beer at the aptly named "the beer store" chains. ive never really seen that scaley thing, but then again, im usually at the LCBo for rum and vodka, not vino

I was in Edmonton in Alberta. It was so damned cold, the tires on my automobile would freeze and then for a long while, I would go thumping and bumping along with a flat spot on my tires. I've never been that cold in my life!

batffink · 05-04-2009, 09:02 PM

Absolutely incredible! I could start a thread here devoted to Quantum Physics, the sex life of Atilla the Hun or Black Holes (No! not those black holes FuckingRotter) and still you lot would surprise me by the extent of your knowledge.

HRH1948 · 05-04-2009, 09:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by batffink

Absolutely incredible! I could start a thread here devoted to Quantum Physics, the sex life of Atilla the Hun or Black Holes (No! not those black holes FuckingRotter) and still you lot would surprise me by the extent of your knowledge.

Actually, I think Attila preferred a stout beer mixed with ox blood. I don't think wine was on the menu.

batffink · 05-05-2009, 05:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by HRH1948

Actually, I think Attila preferred a stout beer mixed with ox blood. I don't think wine was on the menu.

Fucking Priceless.

FuckingRotter · 05-06-2009, 03:40 PM

What he meant to say was 'you lot could bullshit about anything....'

Quote:

Originally Posted by batffink

Absolutely incredible! I could start a thread here devoted to Quantum Physics, the sex life of Atilla the Hun or Black Holes (No! not those black holes FuckingRotter) and still you lot would surprise me by the extent of your knowledge.

HRH1948 · 05-06-2009, 04:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FuckingRotter

What he meant to say was 'you lot could bullshit about anything....'

Here, it is considered an art form. We even have a Bullshit Laureate. He used to be in the White House, but he's finally come back home.

batffink · 05-06-2009, 06:39 PM

Don't worry about FuckingRotter mate, he only needs the slightest bit of encouragement and he'll be there with his white van full of bullshit par exellence.
He tries to appear aloof from all this banter but his devious fucking mind is always working away. He'll poleaxe you between the eyes when you least expect it, mark my words. FuckingRotter invented bullshit.

05-04-2009, 04:56 AM	#2
FuckingRotter The Fist of Fury. Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Entering the.... Posts: 9,649 Reputation: 118903	I used to think that all that wine snobbery was a load of old bollocks. But a couple of years ago Aunty Beeb started showing a series in which James May, a complete beer swilling wine novice travelled across Europe with a wine expert. Now this bloke isn't one of these head up arsehole types and he taught James May that the essence of wine tasting is to describe what you taste. That is where all this sheep shit and pencil shaving nonsense comes from. Sounds like the chap you saw on the Noah was over-egging the pudding somewhat. But if you get a chance to watch the series with James May (I forget the other blokes name), then it may all begin to make sense. __________________ Fist is a four letter word. So is fist, fist, fist, fist, fist, fist fist, fist, fist, fist, fist, and, well you get the fist-fucking picture.... THE WESTCOUNTRY SHALL RISE AGAIN! Yay! It's pink! Don't think.... FEEL! We're Englishmen, and we came here, to rape your women and drink your beer. I went back in time and voted for Hitler. Pouring oil on troubled waters since 2008. Then lighting a fucking match.

05-04-2009, 07:00 AM	#3
MARADONA Banned Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Land of the Lost Posts: 1,838 Reputation: 40272	My Three cents! :D I never watched shows of this kind...so i don't know exactly how it works...btw...i'm italian.... we are the best producers of red in wine in the all world...so i think i know what is good... so i never think that the "all that wine snobbery was a load of old bollocks"...eh eh but i do think that some people are extreme...more then once i visitated some wine producers... specially in Pavia...and yes it still makes me laugh to see old people drink and spit extreme cool wines... it's just that i like only to drink wine...not to spit it. Last edited by MARADONA; 05-04-2009 at 07:05 AM. Reason: Hope it's all clear! ;)

05-04-2009, 07:36 AM	#4
FuckingRotter The Fist of Fury. Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Entering the.... Posts: 9,649 Reputation: 118903	There is some method in their madness! I understand that most of what we taste is actually composed of information from smell receptors. So you take a big gulp whilst breathing in sharply through the nose and swirling the wine around the mouth to ensure all you taste buds get a bit. The spitting out is to reduce the effects of alcohol in dulling the senses. I smoke quite heavily, and I have neither the time, money or inclination to learn as comprehensively about wine as these poncy experts, but as Batfink says I know what I like. My preference is for old world reds, especially French, Italian and Spanish, but I've also developed a taste for Chilean wine in the last few years. White wine I tend to limit myself to anything from a Chardonnay grape, so Chablis, Champagne and Cognac is right up my street. Sicily produces some dry Chardonnays that come out at a higher alcohol content than usual and go great with oysters. Still, wine is like art, all a matter of taste. __________________ Fist is a four letter word. So is fist, fist, fist, fist, fist, fist fist, fist, fist, fist, fist, and, well you get the fist-fucking picture.... THE WESTCOUNTRY SHALL RISE AGAIN! Yay! It's pink! Don't think.... FEEL! We're Englishmen, and we came here, to rape your women and drink your beer. I went back in time and voted for Hitler. Pouring oil on troubled waters since 2008. Then lighting a fucking match.

05-04-2009, 10:34 AM	#7
FuckingRotter The Fist of Fury. Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Entering the.... Posts: 9,649 Reputation: 118903	That's it, Oz Clarke. Thanks Pete. I think Montalcino is available here Maradona, but not the better vats, just the stuff that might as well get turned into cooking sherry and gets sold at Happy Shopper for inflated prices. Just goes to show price is no guide when it comes to wine. I usually spend £6-8.50 on a bottle, but the major supermarket chains here all sell decent own brand plonk for around £3, that serves just as well poured in a bolognese sauce or poured down your own throat! __________________ Fist is a four letter word. So is fist, fist, fist, fist, fist, fist fist, fist, fist, fist, fist, and, well you get the fist-fucking picture.... THE WESTCOUNTRY SHALL RISE AGAIN! Yay! It's pink! Don't think.... FEEL! We're Englishmen, and we came here, to rape your women and drink your beer. I went back in time and voted for Hitler. Pouring oil on troubled waters since 2008. Then lighting a fucking match.

05-04-2009, 12:58 PM	#8
snarkopo It's been fun Join Date: May 2008 Location: away Posts: 1,549 Reputation: 70796	Same as art critics, they're full of shit. Nice to see you back btw. __________________ I have a brontosaurus and you don't. So there.

05-04-2009, 04:27 AM	#1
batffink Privileged Member Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: One Foot In The Grave Posts: 1,376 Reputation: 121541	Wine Snobbery While I was in Queensland last week, I watched a programme on the TV about food and wine. I couldnâ€™t help but shake my head in resignation as some plonker pontificated about some vintage as; â€œA decidedly precocious little drop, somewhat reminiscent of custard apple and pencil shavings and quite cheeky on the nose.â€ And; â€œIâ€™m quite excited about this vintage, obviously from the North Slope, and picked rather late. With overtones of ear wax and a rather aggressive attack on the palate.â€ I ask you, are these wankers for real. Do they actually get paid to mouth this drivel? Or am I an uneducated Philistine? I like wine as much as the next man but I buy what I like and donâ€™t try to piss in other peopleâ€™s pockets and try to impress them with a heap of bullshit. What do you think? I know some of you are from great wine producing regions i.e. California, Australia, France and Italy so how do you see it? __________________ You have the right to remain tied to the bed. Anything you may try to say will be ignored.

05-04-2009, 09:16 AM	#5
pervipete Watching from the shadows Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: The Shadowlands... Posts: 5,170 Reputation: 118528	The guy with James May FR is called Oz Clarke __________________ Tonight love, we'll do a rape roleplay No!! That's the spirit... Spam Reporting Thread The Hazelton Chronicles Blackmailing the MILF's Chapter One The Rape Board Chronicles - LilLinzi in the Alley Consquences

05-04-2009, 06:40 PM	#10
ChiTownHoney Pa'l Mundo Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: ObamaNation Posts: 2,460 Reputation: 33436	I thought all english people were snobs

05-04-2009, 07:37 PM	#11
batffink Privileged Member Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: One Foot In The Grave Posts: 1,376 Reputation: 121541	They are Chitown, they are! But I'm Scottish. __________________ You have the right to remain tied to the bed. Anything you may try to say will be ignored.

05-04-2009, 08:41 PM	#12
HRH1948 Texan by the grace of God Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Republic of Texas Posts: 1,351 Reputation: 133346	I spent a year in Canada during one week, a decade or so back. They had a 1 to 10 scale of sweetness in all of their wine shops. It was great. A #1 tasted like ethanol and a # 10 tasted like melted jello. A #5 suited my taste very well. At home, that system doesn't exist. If I could get past the sweetness issue, I could concentrate on being more of a conasieur.

05-04-2009, 08:48 PM	#13
dashrendar44 Kamina Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: Deep In The African Jungles Of China Posts: 2,733 Reputation: 12819	were you in ontario? were the only province that has mandated alcohol shops, you cant get liquor anywhere but at the LCBO shops, and you can only get beer at the aptly named "the beer store" chains. ive never really seen that scaley thing, but then again, im usually at the LCBo for rum and vodka, not vino __________________ "Go beyond the impossible and kick reason to the curb!" ~ Kamina, Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann "I've been thinking with my gut since I was 14, and I've come to the conclusion that my guts have shit for brains." ~ Rob Gordon, High Fidelity "All men are potential rapists. ALL MEN. Even the pope!" ~ Shirley Valentine "When you're pushed, killing's as easy as breathing." ~ John Rambo, Rambo IV "I don't think I'm easy to talk about. I've got a very irregular head. And I'm not anything that you think I am anyway." ~ Syd Barrett, Rolling Stone, December 1971

05-04-2009, 09:02 PM	#15
batffink Privileged Member Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: One Foot In The Grave Posts: 1,376 Reputation: 121541	Absolutely incredible! I could start a thread here devoted to Quantum Physics, the sex life of Atilla the Hun or Black Holes (No! not those black holes FuckingRotter) and still you lot would surprise me by the extent of your knowledge. __________________ You have the right to remain tied to the bed. Anything you may try to say will be ignored.

05-06-2009, 06:39 PM	#20
batffink Privileged Member Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: One Foot In The Grave Posts: 1,376 Reputation: 121541	Don't worry about FuckingRotter mate, he only needs the slightest bit of encouragement and he'll be there with his white van full of bullshit par exellence. He tries to appear aloof from all this banter but his devious fucking mind is always working away. He'll poleaxe you between the eyes when you least expect it, mark my words. FuckingRotter invented bullshit. __________________ You have the right to remain tied to the bed. Anything you may try to say will be ignored.