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03-23-2008, 01:34 PM | #1 |
Junior Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 6
Reputation: 16 |
The Dark Places of a 39 Year Old Single Mother
It's strange to begin this, because these fantasies/nightmares are something I could never tell anyone directly. Especially when you are in a circle of polite, church-going society and you are emulating the same. But at night, the dreams come...well they started as dreams...nightmares really...working their way from subconscious to fantasy.
It's kind of consuming now, but with no real outlet, I came here. I did scrawl many of these dark things in notebooks I keep hidden, buried, unfindable by anyone but me. However, I found this forum, and it seems like a good place to air these black taboos. After all, how can you tell the ladies at your church pot-luck that you have fantasies about your own daughter being abducted, thrown into the back of a very bad man's car, taken to a desolate place and... It's even hard to say it here, but the pictures in my mind are vivid. I see these things clearly in all their horrible detail. Things like being taken to rape camps...my daughter and I...an awful man using her as leverage to make me do degrading things. My own sense of self loathing as my body betrays me and I orgasm when he rapes me. Like so many stupid romance novels I twistedly come to need him...his cock. But...he rapes her as well...and I have to watch...to suffer it...to surrender to it...to masturbate to it. This is an introduction to the dark things that writhe in my mind at night (sometimes, so inappropriately, in the day.) And to say I write them down without a horrible sense of guilt is a lie. But they are consuming, as I said, and I have to vent them...I feel i have no choice. But at least there are these places to talk about the terrible shadows which connect the violent and erotic. Thanks, Sue |
03-23-2008, 04:26 PM | #2 |
Junior Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 10
Reputation: 10 |
Thats interesting sue,the thought of dominating a mother and daughter is so erotic
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