Cliches and things that make you groan (in a bad way) in Porn - Rape Board

Louise · 04-23-2007, 03:43 PM

OK...as a writer I am as guilty of many of these as anyone else.

But what particular cliches do you hate when reading a story or watching porn?

1) Talking about a "gallon" of cum...NO NO NO...most men shake out a teaspoon or two...realism is necessary.

2) Every man has a cock the size of a 100 year old redwood tree

3) All women have a tight, vice like pussy

4) Women cum when theyre raped...

5) Men can fuck, cum and repeat endlessly until the victim is "flooded"

OK...lots more, but I'm interested in what others think!

insignia0 · 04-23-2007, 03:47 PM

6. Everyone in the film has model looks no matter who they are,

04-23-2007, 03:57 PM

May belong in beastiality.

7.Ever envision elephant cum?

Luke rape stalker · 04-23-2007, 06:55 PM

8. The poor "victim" smile into the camera (look iÂ´m suffer) grrrr how i hate this!!

9. The victim is nude. *gape* torn clothes are much more exciting as nude.

gaggirl · 04-23-2007, 06:59 PM

10. Cheesy dialogue that makes you cringe. One movie I'm thinking in particular with the black guy and the blonde woman. "oooOOooh I dont want to get pregnant!!"

Hellcat · 04-24-2007, 03:45 AM

Im sure ive been guilty on more than one occasion of becoming cliched... *hurries to amend next story before posting

12) When It comes to sex, phrases like ...she was being drilled into... makes it sound like some teen slasher movie

13) The terms slurping, banging, boner, stiffie occur frequently during the racier bits.... really kills the flow of the story for me.

14) Pet names given to genitalia of both sexes... like Love mound and Tube steak

15) My biggest hate is leaping into the action half way down the first paragraph.... The build up can be the most intense thing and the payoff of the "action" increased tenfold because of it.

somedude · 04-24-2007, 03:59 AM

One of the big ones has to be the horrid setup for sex scenes! Oh just delivered the pizza...okay let's have sex...

Louise · 04-24-2007, 04:29 AM

@ HC - "love mound! and tube steak"

if anyone uses those on me, likely to get stabbed

@ SD - Isnt that how im supposed to be paying the pizza delivery guys and girls?

somedude · 04-24-2007, 04:32 AM

Well yeah L!

Guess I need a better example

MADDOGMCMANAMAN · 04-24-2007, 11:38 AM

the worst thing in the world about porno.....is when the guy thinks HE !!! is the star of the video and takes up too much camera time fucking grinnning !!!!!! that really pisses me off !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Louise · 04-24-2007, 03:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MADDOGMCMANAMAN

the worst thing in the world about porno.....is when the guy thinks HE !!! is the star of the video and takes up too much camera time fucking grinnning !!!!!! that really pisses me off !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thats true Maddog...nothing worse than the sight of some inane grinning twat of a bloke as he's getting sucked/cumming/fucking/picking his nose...focus on the action!!!

dashrendar44 · 04-24-2007, 05:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by drmephisto

May belong in beastiality.

7.Ever envision elephant cum?

ever see freddy got fingered starring tom green? if you have, you dont need to envision that @_______________________________@

adding to the list

i hate when the victim "gets into it", thats just retarded, plain and simple

ego · 04-24-2007, 05:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Louise

But what particular cliches do you hate when reading a story or watching porn?

Nice q Lou!

Things i learned reading porn stories:

*I perform the best cunnilingus
*Any mother-in-law will willingly join me and her daughter in bed
*My wife wont mind if i bring another girl in our bed
*She will be huppy if the above mentioned girl is her best friend
*I perform the best cunnilingus
*Any girl i meet in elevetor/stairs is horny and ready to fuck
*All the girls can easily swallow my whole 12 inches
*Orgies happen more often than one on one
*No girl asks for a condom
*I perform the best cunnilingus
*I fuck any cousin of mine comes home
*I need less than 12' to pick a girl from any bar/cafe/supermarket/mall
*Less than 8' if they are two and i suggest a triangle
*All secretaries fuck their boss
*Half of them while his wife watches and masturbates

p.s. *I perform the best cunnilingus

Louise · 04-24-2007, 05:30 PM

LMFAO!!! Ego..thats fantastic.

I heard you do give the best cunnilingus though, is that true? LOL

sindyloo · 04-27-2007, 01:19 PM

WORST is a BAD fucking Story Line??? Like come on stick with the damn plot already!! Dont be jumping around!??

04-23-2007, 03:43 PM	#1
Louise Privileged Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 1,865 Reputation: 4905	Cliches and things that make you groan (in a bad way) in Porn OK...as a writer I am as guilty of many of these as anyone else. But what particular cliches do you hate when reading a story or watching porn? 1) Talking about a "gallon" of cum...NO NO NO...most men shake out a teaspoon or two...realism is necessary. 2) Every man has a cock the size of a 100 year old redwood tree 3) All women have a tight, vice like pussy 4) Women cum when theyre raped... 5) Men can fuck, cum and repeat endlessly until the victim is "flooded" OK...lots more, but I'm interested in what others think!

04-23-2007, 03:47 PM	#2
insignia0 Privileged Member Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: uk Posts: 171 Reputation: 692	6. Everyone in the film has model looks no matter who they are, __________________ I'm not afraid of death. It's the stake one puts up in order to play the game of life.

04-24-2007, 03:45 AM	#6
Hellcat At Rest Join Date: Jan 2007 Posts: 1,808 Reputation: 1841	Im sure ive been guilty on more than one occasion of becoming cliched... hurries to amend next story before posting 12) When It comes to sex, phrases like ...she was being drilled into... makes it sound like some teen slasher movie 13) The terms slurping, banging, boner, stiffie occur frequently during the racier bits.... really kills the flow of the story for me. 14) Pet names given to genitalia of both sexes... like Love mound and Tube steak 15) My biggest hate is leaping into the action half way down the first paragraph.... The build up can be the most intense thing and the payoff of the "action" increased tenfold because of it. __________________ â€œIf you should die before me, take my hand and ask if you could bring along a friendâ€* Last edited by Hellcat; 04-24-2007 at 03:59 AM.

04-24-2007, 03:59 AM	#7
somedude W.I.R. and Marshal Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Way out West!!!! Posts: 8,566 Reputation: 124981	One of the big ones has to be the horrid setup for sex scenes! Oh just delivered the pizza...okay let's have sex... __________________ I'm a pervert and proud of it!

04-24-2007, 04:32 AM	#9
somedude W.I.R. and Marshal Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Way out West!!!! Posts: 8,566 Reputation: 124981	Well yeah L! Guess I need a better example __________________ I'm a pervert and proud of it!

04-23-2007, 03:57 PM	#3
drmephisto Guest Posts: n/a	May belong in beastiality. 7.Ever envision elephant cum?

04-23-2007, 06:55 PM	#4
Luke rape stalker or Jekyll and Hyde Join Date: Apr 2006 Posts: 781 Reputation: 1695	8. The poor "victim" smile into the camera (look iÂ´m suffer) grrrr how i hate this!! 9. The victim is nude. gape torn clothes are much more exciting as nude.

04-23-2007, 06:59 PM	#5
gaggirl * yawn * Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Australia Posts: 3,058 Reputation: 40178	10. Cheesy dialogue that makes you cringe. One movie I'm thinking in particular with the black guy and the blonde woman. "oooOOooh I dont want to get pregnant!!"

04-24-2007, 04:29 AM	#8
Louise Privileged Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 1,865 Reputation: 4905	@ HC - "love mound! and tube steak" if anyone uses those on me, likely to get stabbed @ SD - Isnt that how im supposed to be paying the pizza delivery guys and girls?

04-24-2007, 11:38 AM	#10
MADDOGMCMANAMAN PUSSYCRUSHER Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: YOUR MOMMAS HOUSE Posts: 2,161 Reputation: 9875	the worst thing in the world about porno.....is when the guy thinks HE !!! is the star of the video and takes up too much camera time fucking grinnning !!!!!! that really pisses me off !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! __________________ The Original PUSSYCRUSHER !!

04-24-2007, 05:30 PM	#14
Louise Privileged Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 1,865 Reputation: 4905	LMFAO!!! Ego..thats fantastic. I heard you do give the best cunnilingus though, is that true? LOL

04-27-2007, 01:19 PM	#15
sindyloo Privileged Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 2,178 Reputation: 34844	Worst Of All WORST is a BAD fucking Story Line??? Like come on stick with the damn plot already!! Dont be jumping around!?? __________________ Tommy Loy, the cabin boy, The dirty little nipper, He filled his ass With broken glass And cirumcized the skipper!