What is it about rape role plays for you

[RavishAGirl]

I'll try and jump in with a man's voice on this fantasy. I was introduced most fully to this fantasy by a woman, a lover. Her desire to be ravished and taken and conquered and adored was very hot, her passion for it was very hot.

As a man, I know some women who have been hurt deeply in their lives and believe themselves not beautiful or not worthy of having beautiful sex. They wear layers of shields like emotional condoms to protect themselves, and it is so hard for them to be truly vulnerable with a lover, or to let a man inside both their body and their spirit so deeply. They can't 'let loose.' Just as Jasmine dreams of being 'forced' to let loose so that she can be more fully herself without feeling guilty for being herself, there is a corresponding male fantasy that involves peeling a woman free of her clothing and her shields, having her naked and vulnerable, exciting and pleasuring her, no matter how much she might try to protest that she needs those shields, she needs to be a good girl, she needs to not enjoy wanting and being wanted. For a man in a roleplay partnership there is the thrill of conquest and the adrenaline and the joy of both taking her and freeing her. This actually has nothing to do with rape, which is entirely about one's own gratification and does not recognize the other person as a person. The fantasy of ravishment is about overcoming the barrier of 'social' maidenhead. The appeal of the fantasy is about unleashing the inner woman in your lover, and not letting anything get in your way of doing so. It's about moving aggressively toward that goal of intimacy when so many things (things she has been taught about herself, for instance) stand in the way.

I'm well aware of the superficial resemblance to the 'She wants it' mentality of abusers. But abusers use that as justification for hurting someone and for gratifying their own needs without regard for anyone else. In a consenting roleplay, a ravisher is playing the part of the forceful villain out of love or affection. He is playing that part for two reasons. First, he doesn't want her to hold back or be held back. He wants to leave her breathless, sweating, gasping, wildly satisfied. He doesn't want her to be held back by her thoughts about her body, or about sex, or about her worth as a person. He wants to goddamn it show her that she has worth, that she is infinitely worth having and loving. And second, he doesn't want himself to hold back. He wants to ravish her and make love to her with every aggressive part of himself, he wants to enter her more deeply than she has ever been entered, he wants to be primal. He wants to be lustful. He wants to capture her body and her soul, and he intends to overcome every obstacle to that. He wants to be the man who sees what he wants, takes it, and makes women swoon.

That's all a description of a fantasy, but it is a fantasy that is about letting go of our inhibitions, for both the man and the woman. The resemblance to sexual violence is only a superficial one ... for the very same reason that the resemblance between light bondage between a happy couple and a brutal kidnapping is only a superficial one.

Hope this helps shed a little more light.

//Ravish

Originally Posted by Reimagined

I hadn't really thought of it that way, Jasmine. But in reading what you wrote, it makes a lot of sense.

I read some of the descriptions on here that can be very detailed and sometimes brutal, and I think to myself: "This looks too much like the real thing."

I'm coming to understand that it's the underlying motivation as to why people enjoy this so much. The connotation of rape has always been held in a negative light and rightly so. But what I have been confused about is how men and women can say they detest rape in real life, and yet entertain the notion in fantasy, and even enjoy it.

I'm not going to pretend that I fully get it. But I'm trying.

[ChiTownHoney]

Originally Posted by FuckingRotter

The idea that I would consider committing rape a bad thing is a long stretch of the imagination. I'm a hairs breadth away from it every day, role play is a poor substitute and only common human decency prevents me from doing it for real.

This is the best post I have every read of yours FuckingRotter. Well done.

[FuckingRotter]

Just a candid rotten moment, trying to be as honest as I think this board allows me to be. And you're right what you said in the Rowdy thread Chi, the line between fantasy and reality is very thin. For me and my girl it is very real indeed.

[crimsondesire]

RavishAgirl...That was a beautifull post. I appreciate that, I never seen it that way before but you are apsolutly right and you even made me giggle with your condom referance. You sort of... hit the nail of the head there. I need...to let go,I want to be taken and can only be consumed by the man I love. In regards to the....he wants to believe she wants it for his own self serving reasons. That is true...but I also think there is more to it then that. Perhaps he wants to feel wanted,perhaps the act to him although still self serving,they are searching for something with the person that just isnt there,they want the person and have trouble with percieving the difference between reality and fantasy,for their own benefit,pretend there is something behind it at all when it is just a dillusion.

[RavishAGirl]

Originally Posted by crimsondesire

RavishAgirl...That was a beautifull post. I appreciate that, I never seen it that way before but you are apsolutly right and you even made me giggle with your condom referance.

Thanks, Crimson.

Your own posts leave me breathless.

//Ravish