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Old 10-11-2009, 10:07 AM   #22
Fae
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Actually outside my husband, no one in my real life would ever have a clue I have this fetish. I'm one of those play it safe, in control by doing the smart thing, don't take risks people. When I go out in a bad neighborhood, I blend in. I wear old jeans and a t-shirt, walk like I know the neighborhood even if I don't, act like I'm never scared or nervous, and so on. Do nothing that would make me stand out.

I wouldn't play rape bait for strangers because it Russian roulette what you get. Do I want the strung out druggie hyped up on PCP coming after me (been there), or maybe the stalker I had for 6 months who I found out slept in the dumpster behind my apartment building (eeew!). And I certainly don't want to wind up a resident of the city morgue because I really did fight back.

I'm actually really scared of strangers in general, even the safe ones. I'm basically the Chi opposite. I'm actually so shy about my sexuality that my husband called it a "big step" when I started posting on here because I used to get scared of strangers even on the net. The thing is, the fear is the adrenaline rush and part of the turn on. A bigger turn on would be my husband deciding to punish me and arranging some stranger(s) to rape me. It's the only close to real scenario I can come up with where I wouldn't risk ending up in the hospital or morgue: maimed or killed just really isn't in my fantasy life.

Last edited by Fae; 10-15-2009 at 05:29 AM.
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