[Deep Dark Desires]

The icon appeared at the bottom of my screen, a tiny little yellow envelope, a new mail message. As I clicked to retrieve, my body tingled, she had sent me an email. My short lived joy was crushed by the added group of co workers. Rachel had invited everyone to drinks after work. This was my chance, could I talk to her, would she talk to me……

I knew everything about her, where she likes to go out, what perfume she wears, her routine, but she did not know me. Her hair…light brown, just past her shoulders, with a slight wave through it, her piercing green eyes, her structured cheekbones, her 10C cup size, how she wore only matching underwear, her long inviting legs. I had learnt everything about her, what she enjoyed to do, the movies she likes, the music she listens too, the dickheads she dated, the dates that went wrong, I had listened and watched, quietly in the background.

Time seemed to standstill from when Rachel sent the email til the end of the work day. I looked down at my apparel, I felt confident that she would notice me… I have noticed her for 2 years, but she has never noticed me.

I stood near the edge of the bar, giving slight nods and brief hello’s to people from work who were ordering, my focus was on Rachel, how she sipped her drink, her laugh and how she twists the end of her hair when she looks interested in a guy. She was the type of girl who did not order a drink, they were ordered for her, my challenge to talk to her was getting harder.