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Old 03-24-2015, 10:46 AM   #17
MissyB
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kypris View Post
I don't know anyone in real life who wouldn't freak the hell out if I told them.


This is one of my fears, that I will reveal this kink of mine to a partner only to have him take advantage of it. Either by taking it as license to take whatever he wants over my protests or by threatening to tell people. Fantasizing about this exact scenario gets me super wet but having someone hold this over me in real life would be unbearable.

Though actually the only time I revealed the extent of my rape fetish it was disastrous in the opposite way - he was very freaked out. We broke up soon after and I'm pretty sure knowing I was into rapey sex was part of it. My last ex-bf did know I had a bit of a submissive side (that's hard to hide) but I never let slip how twisted my fantasies actually get.
This is why I feel it's so risky for us ladies. You don't want the guy to take advantage of the admission but the other side of that would be that they wouldn't understand and might think you're some kind of freak. I had read an article about this subject in a magazine. The woman mentioned to her BF that she wanted him to rape her (fantasy, not for real) and they would have a safe word. Well, one night after they were at a party and returned to their hotel room, he pushed her down on the bed and took it from her. She said no but he thought that was part of it. Afterwards, she told him that's not what she wanted but she took some responsibility over the miscommunication. He became very upset despite her not blaming him. They broke up after that weekend.

So yeah, there's risk for us. But isn't that at least part of the reason we are all here on RB? It's like our safe zone in a way. :-)
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