Rape bloopers?
 

Any of you real life performers ever had a scenario gone seriously awry? I'm asking because earlier today:

1. The original plan was to break in to rape dates room, rape her, then march her at knife point to my van for a bit of kidnapping and rape in the woods. She texted me shortly before my arrival to tell me her housemates were still up.

2. Thinking on my toes, I instructed her to come outside when I arrived.

3. She, stupidly, complied. A struggle ensued, and I bundled her in to the van. Thing is, she had decided yo wear very short, tight, shorts. They looked great, but.

4. When we arrived at our rural rape retreat, her un-raped, un-beaten, and generally un-cowed, she had to walk, with me knife-threatening, and wrist-gripping, through above knee height brambles and nettles. In the end I had to give her a piggy back!

5. Then when I was doing her up the Gary, the little bitch pick-pocketed me, and threw my knife on the ground!

6. After marching her back ghrough the woods and driving her home, we attempted two-handed fisting, but her bed made this awkward.

7. I went up stairs to wash my hands, and nearly went arse over tit on my way back down. I think I may have fractured a toe.

Despite all this we're really rather pleased with ourselves.